As I have a summer job and my weekdays are filled with it, I have to work for people (the obvious). During work, people treat me quite special for numbers of reasons, and one of them is that I am young. People expected relatively little from me. If I screw something up, I do not get the standard treatment in an office, not that I do screw up anything. My work consists of imperfection that I carelessly look over, but luckily there will always be a person to double check my work to ensure the normal operation of the office. And because of all my imperfections, people built a profile of me that writes me as a typical high schooler. Not a miracle nor a spoiled brat, and that I am just one of the many in the line high schoolers in the world. With that said, when they found out that I can actually do things, I was quite blushed. It felt good with me knowing that I have impressed some people. To be honest, all my life, I have been trying to impress people. I only post stories of me to my friends when I have done something that I think is impressive. I never post anything that normal, and I have always try to be above the normal crowd. I want to impress others, and revealing my skills to a new person really makes me feel like that they are impressed. It is like revealing a superpower, a thing that is not known but was be known. And it feels especially good when you are not the one telling them your skill. I feel super good when the revealing comes naturally, and that the people finding out are genuinely surprised.
In my job, I only revealed that I know programming and that I am very familiar with computers. I did not tell them that I am quite good at art, and it makes it quite fun for me to keep it a secret until something comes and reveals it naturally. Although you could say that my fun in hiding a "superpower" is just another way of saying hiding a secret, that secret that I am able to hide is gained from my own work, interest, and some dedication. Knowing that you have done something significant (not that any of my stuff is) and that it is not known interests me a lot. It is such a fun thing to have a secret card that you could pull out whenever you want to.
In the end, I still need to work even more harder to keep my standard that I have set right now. The most dreaded things that I am concerned about is that I would stop improving myself since I think I'm the needle in a haystack of high schoolers. I know that my grades aren't the best, and neither is the difficulty of the classes that I am taking, but there is still a chance that I think I had enough of what I need and stop improving. People are amazed by my skills only because of my age, and it is not really about the rarity and difficulty of the skills itself. As I get older, if I still want to have a secret card that I could pull out and impress others, I have to work more diligently. This all may sound childish and trivial, but I guess anything that drives a person in the right direction should be classified as good quality or thought (typical me that find excuses).
Me in the world of my own fantasy land, where I still think that superspeed is possible This is my own hand-made notebook that I loved and used to the last of the last bit. |